


COME UNDONE

by Knightsbridge07



Category: Black Panther (2018), Endgame - Fandom, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-14
Updated: 2019-05-14
Packaged: 2020-03-04 21:19:42
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,562
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18820945
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Knightsbridge07/pseuds/Knightsbridge07
Summary: In the aftermath of Tony Stark's banishment from Wakanda, Shuri does her best to deal with her pain.Yeah, it's sad...SUE ME!





	COME UNDONE

**Author's Note:**

  * For [nonotwithoutyoux](https://archiveofourown.org/users/nonotwithoutyoux/gifts), [lilithenaltum](https://archiveofourown.org/users/lilithenaltum/gifts), [Kookynella](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kookynella/gifts), [GinaPorterss](https://archiveofourown.org/users/GinaPorterss/gifts), [lotus123](https://archiveofourown.org/users/lotus123/gifts), [Malaiikka](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Malaiikka/gifts), [stanimal](https://archiveofourown.org/users/stanimal/gifts), [baby_bubastis](https://archiveofourown.org/users/baby_bubastis/gifts), [TheRavynFire](https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheRavynFire/gifts), [SilverCherie](https://archiveofourown.org/users/SilverCherie/gifts), [Tambisa](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tambisa/gifts), [writingforeverapassion](https://archiveofourown.org/users/writingforeverapassion/gifts), [Rix1998](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rix1998/gifts), [UngarnMoc](https://archiveofourown.org/users/UngarnMoc/gifts), [Cao_the_dreamer](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cao_the_dreamer/gifts), [Esso1979](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Esso1979/gifts), [crazyfan15](https://archiveofourown.org/users/crazyfan15/gifts), [CindersAndBrimstone](https://archiveofourown.org/users/CindersAndBrimstone/gifts), [rachealina](https://archiveofourown.org/users/rachealina/gifts), [Mina_Romanov](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mina_Romanov/gifts), [nonotwithoutyou](https://archiveofourown.org/users/nonotwithoutyou/gifts), [wakandawinterprincess](https://archiveofourown.org/users/wakandawinterprincess/gifts), [misstoryunfolded](https://archiveofourown.org/users/misstoryunfolded/gifts).
  * Inspired by [Undertow](https://archiveofourown.org/works/15067538) by [lilithenaltum](https://archiveofourown.org/users/lilithenaltum/pseuds/lilithenaltum). 



It has been three months since Tony Stark was banished from Wakanda for life. T’Challa is officially back on the throne, and the Tribal Elders’ Council has agreed to some changes in light of the upheaval during her brother’s absence and Shuri’s own short reign as queen.

 

The country is well on its way to normal—whatever that means in a post-Thanos world, a world that had experienced a mass resurrection of billions of dead. Captain Steve Rogers, though his body is buried in Brooklyn, he’s been given a place in the necropolis of the Black Panthers. The empty sarcophagus is made of white marble, instead of black granite like the venerated kings and queens, and the captain’s likeness is carved into the lid. It’s the first, and quite likely the only time such an honor will be bestowed upon a non-Wakandan.

 

Shuri feels twice her age even though the burden of rulership is off her shoulders for the foreseeable future, possibly for the rest of her life. Shuri once in a while catches glimpses of Sgt. Barnes when he is training with the Hatut Zeraze or in conference with T’Challa, Nakia, or Okoye. He doesn’t seem to notice her, or if he does, he never looks her way. The one time he does, however, he shoots her a cold and indifferent glance that causes her stomach to twist into knots. He has a right to his hard feelings. She doesn’t hold out hope that they’ll ever come to an understanding about all that’s happened.

 

In the meanwhile, her scientific work and her baby girl occupy the bulk of her time. Shuri keeps to herself most days and works alone in her laboratory while Thandiwe toddles about in her playpen. She speaks from time to time via video chat with Jane and Bruce. They all agree to dismantle the time machine, melt down its parts, and wipe the schematics from her hard drives, lest the technology fall into the wrong hands. She doesn’t mention it but just assumes that Tony has had FRIDAY to do the same.

 

Shuri nods appreciatively when they ask after her and Thandi’s well-being. Jane and Bruce are traveling together to explore where their burgeoning relationship is headed.

 

“We’re just taking it one day at a time,” Bruce says from a treehouse hotel in Bali. Jane, wearing a turquoise bathing suit and a large straw hat, waves from the background.

 

“Well, don’t take _too_ much time, you two,” Shuri says as she moves Thandi from one hip to the other to keep the baby from grabbing at her jewelry. “If it helps, I think you two make a lovely couple. That’s just my opinion, though.”

 

Bruce laughs a bit, a light blush tinting his face and ears, then his brown eyes turn sympathetic. “So, uh, have you…”

 

“No,” she answers and presses her lips into a thin line. She hopes her tone conveys her discomfort with that rather touchy subject.

 

He seems to pick up on her cue. “Well, Jane and I are headed to dinner in a few minutes. If you need anything, Shuri, you know you can call us…even if it’s just to talk.”

 

“Thank you, Bruce. Anyway, you and Jane have fun.”

 

Shuri ends the video call and shifts the baby higher up on her hip and catches her little hand before she can grab her earring. “You are just so _grabby_ today, princess. Let’s put you back over here with your plushies,” she says and gently places a squealing Thandi in her playpen.

 

* * *

 

It’s near midnight one night when Shuri returns from her lab to the palace. Thandi is out cold on her shoulder, and her Dora detail bid her farewell with the Wakandan salute and a bow of their heads. Shuri’s fatigue pushes her to skip her usual evening regimen of bathing Thandi before bed and reading her story. She figures she’ll just do it in the morning before heading out. Once the baby is resting in her crib and the monitor is turned on, Shuri makes quick work of changing into her nightgown, brushing her teeth, and washing her face. She doesn’t bother wrapping her hair for the night.

 

She plops face down on the large bed, then rolls to the center. Shuri stares up at the high ceilings as the ambient sounds of the night waft in with the light, spring breeze through her open balcony doors.

 

 _Just sleep_ , she whines in her head. _Just close your eyes and go to sleep. Is that so hard?_ She glances toward the baby monitor, hopeful that Thandi might provide some distraction with a wet diaper or a cry for a feeding. All Shuri hears is a soft chuffing noise.

 

Her weariness is bone-deep, something she’d not been able to shake since that heartbreaking day on the tarmac when she’d kissed Tony Stark goodbye forever and watched as the quinjet disappeared into the clouds.

 

Reminders were everywhere—of their arguments, their discoveries…their lovemaking.

 

Another stronger breeze whips past the drapes, causing them to wave about like ghosts. The wind is cool on her legs, and it causes the hem of her nightgown to billow upward. Shuri exhales a long stream of air as she lifts her gown above her waist and touches herself, moving slowly at first then speeding up to a rhythm that makes sweat bead across her forehead. She’s getting close when her back arches and her eyes screw shut until finally she climaxes, and Tony’s name slides past her lips with a whispery, choked cry that extends the two syllables.

 

“ _Tuh-o-o-nee…ahh_ … _ohh_ ”

 

Shuri floats back down and lays flat while her heart rate steadies itself once more.

 

_Please, don’t ever forget me…_

 

Tears then begin to flow from her eyes and down the sides of her face, her body heaving and shuddering. She rolls again until her face is buried in a pillow and she cries uncontrollably. She’s so angry, it feels as though her throat is closing—angry because it’s not Tony’s fingers pleasuring her, or Tony’s breath whispering and warm across her skin, angry that Tony isn’t there for her to wrap herself around. Shuri beats the mattress with her fist and she groans Tony’s name and curses the circumstances that brought her here—that brought them all to _this_.

 

The gentle knock at her door causes Shuri’s head to jerk up, and she wipes her tears with her forearm.

 

“Who is it?” she asks, trying to keep her voice light.

 

“It’s Mama, Shuri. May I come in?” Romonda says.

 

Shuri curses under her breath and scrambles out of the bed. “Just a minute, Mama,” she says as she runs into her bathroom to wash her hands and splash cold water on her face. Once she’s done what she can to look like she _hasn’t_ been crying, she crawls back into bed and pulls the covers up to her waist.

 

“Come in.”

 

Romonda, clad in a tropical-patterned silk peignoir set, steps inside and quietly closes the door. She sits on the edge of her daughter’s bed.

 

Even in the dead of night, with the entire palace out cold and off to dreamland, Romonda manages to look like a centerfold.

 

“I was on my way to the kitchen to have a bite when I heard you crying.”

 

“Crying? _Me?_ ” Shuri looked incredulous. “You’re probably just hearing things, Mama.”

 

Romonda quirked an eyebrow and tilted her chin down. She gave her daughter a _child-who-do-you-think-you’re-fooling_ stare. “Really, Shuri, come now. I’m not at that stage of life where my ears have started playing tricks on me. Would any of this have to do with Mr. Stark?”

 

Shuri hoists up onto her elbows to get herself upright. She turns on the lamp on her bedside table then settles back against her pillows. “Is it _that_ obvious?”

 

She hopes crying was all Romonda heard.

 

“I can’t imagine it would be anything else.” Romonda crosses her legs, causing the slit of her gown to fall open. She leans toward her daughter with a small, sad smile and takes her hand, squeezing it gently.

 

“Mama, I…I just feel like I’m going crazy. I feel powerless and helpless and hopeless.”

 

“Getting involved with a married man, and certainly, the likes of Mr. Stark, was bound to be fraught with emotional land mines. The two of you managed to step on most of them.”

 

 _Land mines_ , she thinks bitterly, _how apt_. For what they shared to be compared to weapons of mass destruction caused her a brief moment of offense. Ultimately, though, it made perfect sense. She and Tony had a romance—a love—whose power was equal to a meteor striking the earth. They’d burned everything in their path. She almost wants to laugh. How could she and Tony _not_ fall in love? She, a princess in a land still believed by most to be mere legend…he, with his shining, super-advanced armor. It's the stuff of fairytales. Too bad this one was darker than the usual.

 

However illicit it was, though, in her eyes, what she and Tony had was pure and beautiful and sweet. It had given her the sweet baby currently asleep in the nursery next door. Inter-tribal and international relations be damned.

 

“You’ve not talked to him since he…left?”

 

“No. Maybe he’s working things out with his wife so that she’s not around for any video calls with Thandi. I-I don’t know what’s going on.”

 

That’s only a partial truth. Shuri scans the Internet every other day to see whatever small blurbs or fuzzy photos the media publishes. One day last week, she had caught sight of a clear photo of him and Pepper dining outdoors at a bistro in New York, while little Jude napped in his stroller. As they were both wearing shades, it was hard to read their faces, but they were leaning in close to each other as though engaged in deep conversation. If that was anything to go by, the two were well on their way to reconciliation.

 

Shuri could hack FRIDAY to see for herself what’s up, or maybe talk to Bruce, but either of those options would be a dead giveaway of her desperation. As far as she knew, the outside world was aware that she’d had a child, but not that the baby was Tony’s. She couldn’t risk that.

 

“Oh, Shuri, I suppose this is somewhat my fault. Growing up, your baba and I and T’Challa never denied you a thing. We’d all made it our business to see to it you were never sad or that you didn’t know what it meant to truly hurt. And now…well…”

 

“It’s not your fault or anyone else’s, Mama. Just mine and, to a lesser degree, Tony’s,” she says and wipes more tears with the back of her hand.

 

Romonda frowns a bit, more out of curiosity than sadness. She scoots further onto the bed and lies down so that she is face to face with her daughter. Shuri gulps down a sob.

 

“My darling please tell me what it is about that man that has you behaving like this. Stark may be brilliant, but he is reckless. Has he not brought enough suffering into your life? Is there no one else who excites your fancy? What of Sgt. Barnes?”

 

Shuri rolls her eyes at the mention of Barnes, and her mother immediately knows not to bring up that name again. Still, she greatly appreciates her mother’s sympathy and patience, despite how irritated she had been the whole time with Shuri and Tony’s ongoing Romeo and Juliet drama.

 

She hadn’t known what it was about Tony in the beginning. He believed strongly in her abilities, which pushed him to first reach out for her help. He later became a friend and a comfort. She couldn’t pinpoint when she’d fallen for him, but it was before Thandi’s conception.

 

By then, she was trying to put him out of her mind, trying not to need him. Shuri wanted to find any weakness whatsoever that might diminish Anthony Stark’s allure. Maybe he needed her too much. His pretentious swagger should be a turnoff to most women. Or could it be the very precise way he maintained his goatee that should have bothered her?

 

It was to no avail because she found those traits and most of his others rather endearing—even the dark and self-destructive ones. Shuri loves him, and she has no idea what she’s going to do without him. Quite possibly her lack of experience where lovers were concerned was influencing her feelings, but the emotional connection she’d formed with Tony went beyond anything physical. It might have been that way with Bucky if it’d gotten that far, but she doesn’t trouble herself thinking about it anymore. She is as much a fool for Tony as he is for her.

 

“I love Tony,” Shuri sobs. “I’m wrong, I know that. He and I tore apart a whole family, caused division between the Avengers, or rather worsened it. I understand what I did, and he does, too. We’re a pair of heartless, callous bastards.”

 

“Shuri—”

 

“No, it’s true. There’s no blaming it on the stress of being queen, or of missing everyone who got dusted, or on fighting off the insurrections. I went after a man with a wife and a child. I fell in love with Tony Stark, that’s it, that’s all.”

 

Romonda rubs her daughter’s scalp to calm her down.

 

“I’m sorry, love. I do wish there was something I could do to remedy your situation.”

 

“The whole country thinks I’m a piece-of-shit tramp with a crown, Mama, maybe they’re right. I can accept that. But I don’t know how I’ll ever accept a life without Tony.”

 

“If it is of any consolation to you, I believe the Elders’ Council’s decision was unnecessarily harsh. Despite the very clear fact that Stark’s expertise was key in helping to save the country and the _world_ , they still thought exile to be the most suitable punishment. They wanted to make an example of him.”

 

“They took him away from me.” Shuri quiets and blinks slowly in the dim light. “Did you tell them he almost died several times after helping us test the time machine? Do they know it was Tony, not Captain Rogers, who was supposed to make the snap that defeated Thanos? I spent half the battle fighting with Tony to keep him from sacrificing himself… _again_. If the council hadn’t banished him, he’d be helping us rebuild.”

 

Romonda shakes her head sorrowfully.

 

“In any case, Shuri, Mr. Stark is back home in New York now…with **_Mrs._** Stark, with his son.” Romonda kisses her daughter’s temple and reaches over her to turn off the lamp. “Please try to move on, child,” she whispers.

 

Shuri says nothing, and her mother leaves her with a soft pat to her braids.

 

She tries her best to do as Romonda had suggested, but she’s already failing miserably. Her senses take over. Her mind sees soft hazel eyes, dark brown hair, distinguished laugh lines, and the blue glow of his arc reactor. She smells faint odors of sweat and machine oil. She feels soft lips trailing kisses along her jawline and down her neck. The familiar whisper of  _pretty baby_ ghosts by her ear.

 

_I wish, too._

 

**Author's Note:**

> Caught in that Undertow again... *shakes fist* DAMN YOU, lilithenaltum!!!!!
> 
> Anyhoo, feel free to comment, quote your favorite part(s). Just remember, it's all lilithenaltum's fault.


End file.
